This past year, as I approach 40, I have been making more effort with my looks, wearing make-up and doing my nails. In the past this was something I only did on special occassions and my husband would get all excited when I got “dolled-up”. Six years ago, when I got a professional manicure for the first time, my husband was so excited, he offered to watch the kids so I could go get my nails done on a regular basis. Back then I didn’t take him up on the offer.

Now, I often sit next to him doing my nails. Once done, I always flash my nails at him and ask him what he thinks. He gives a non-enthusiastic “looks nice” which I know means “I could care less.” So finally I congronted him on this and he admited that he likes me just the way I am, not all this fake stuff. I feel comfortable that he “likes” the real me, but I would like like him to be “attracted” to me as well. Given his lack of libido, disinterest in spending alone time with me and no compliments about appearance/sexiness/figure, I wonder if he is even truely attracted to me. I feel like he loves me, but isn’t IN love with me. I don’t know if I’m just upset that he doesn’t compliment me or if he is not attracted to the extra efforts I am making.

When I ask him, he always says he is very attracted to me, but none of his actions follow through on that.