How do I control exposing myself naked to random males?
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I am a 27 year old working woman.
I have this habit of exposing my nude body to any male I get a chance. I have had this habit since 8th class. Till now, I have exposed to about 40 males and have posted my nude videos on net (without face) which have combined views of over 3lakhs. I always want to control myself but could never resist the temptation of being seen nude by a guy.
Most, I have shown myself naked to our bathroom cleaner about some 30 odd times. Then few moths back our cableman had come to check the problem with the TV and nobody was home so I saw the oppourtunity and went to the next room and got naked and started waiting for him and left the door open enough for him to see and as he was passing, I started pretending talking on the phone to get his attention and showed myself nude to him for 10 minutes or more.
Then, few days back my brother’s friend came home and asked for him and again no one was at home and I knew that my brother will take time but deliberately I asked him to sit and wait and as he sat I told him I need to change and went to my room and again left the door open enough for him to see and then got naked and as I expected he came and started peeping and I took my phone and started pretending messaging and started roaming around nude giving him a perfect view of my nude body and showed him for about 15 minutes and he probably also recorded me from his cell but I could not look at him properly so dont know exactly but later felt very bad for my brother and if his friend had recorded me nude then he probably would be showing it to their other friends which is also making me feel worse for my brother.
Then recently we had gone to our cousin brother’s wedding where I showed myself naked to their servant.
But my major reason for worry is that my parents have now fixed my wedding and am getting married this June. I want to stop it NOW but I am not able to do so. Can anybody please suggest something which will be of help.
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Your exhibitionist activities have given you thrills that are hard to control. This is a psychological addiction that may lead you into trouble once you’re married, and I have to say that you are fortunate that nothing bad has happened to you so far. It’s a sad fact of life that some men will see your display of nudity as justification for rape, and any of those who you’ve exposed yourself to might have decided, on the spur of the moment, that it was worth taking the chance!!! Only a small number of girls who suffer any kind of sexual assault actually report it to the police, and therefore, men usually get away with what is the worst crime, short of murder, that a man can commit.
Givng up something you love to do is very difficult, and believe me, as someone who beat heroin addiction I know about breaking addiction!!! The first issue is determining if you really WANT to stop,because until you really do want to break this, you will fail. Stopping because you know it’s risky, or because you think it’s bad doesn’t work, because it’s the risk that excites you, and if we’re truthful the badness can also be a strong motivation, what is more tempting than the excitement of tasting the forbidden fruit?
To break my addiction, I had help from rehab counselling, but I don’t know what is available in India for the kind of help you might need. Your family doctor could recommend a psychiatrist who can help you understand what motivates you, and once you can get a grip of the behaviour, maybe you can stop. But, as I say, YOU have to WANT TO STOP!!!
If you really want to continue, you can do so, but make sure you keep it to exposing yourself on the internet only, and make sure no one can identify you from your face, or can recognise your house etc. If you keep to this, yo are safe enough, but no more exposing to random guys in your house, or at friends or family. No more live exposures at all if you value your safety!!!
As for marriage, get your exhibitionist behaviour under control, or decide how to continue to do it safely, before YOU decide on who YOU ant to marry!!!