How to convince my wife about my wearing bras and panties?
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I am a married man with a child. I love to wear bras and panties very much. My wife does not like me doing that. How can I convince her of my passion to wear these items?
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Bra and Panty Lover,
Your question is quite complex. About trying to convince your wife about your fetish, I shall discuss later.
Let us first try to analyze your desire to cross dress and wear female clothing. Do you only want to wear bra and panties or do you also wear sarees and gowns and other accessories like lip stick and eye liner etc?
One of the reasons you use female garments is the need to be attractive and you are associating this with the reason that women have more sexual advances from men. You have made the bra and panty a symbol of sexuality rather than just a piece of clothing. Women’s clothing becomes associated with sex. Items like bras and panties, even for normal men, become fetish objects by a simple process of association with the arousal they feel when they see or feel them on desirable women.
In most parts of the world, gender is traditionally represented as male or female. However, gender is much more complex than male or female. A heterosexual male may cross-dress because he doesn’t feel his gender identity matches the gender he was assigned at birth. Cross-dressing isn’t something that needs to be “overcome” or “resisted.”
But the problem arises when you have to get another party like your wife to accept your fetish for cross dressing. Does she wear pants? You can explain to her that pants were traditionally worn by males, but roles are changing. Most transvestites hide their need to cross-dress. They keep it secret from their parents, siblings, friends, workmates, neighbours, even their wives. It isn’t hard to pretend to be normal because, in every other way, the transvestite is normal. But it is hard to suppress the urge to dress up. So the majority of transvestites yield to the urge then live in fear of being discovered. They also live with the constant pain of hiding their true nature from the people they love.
You have told your wife about your need for cross dressing. It may not be able to convince her about your needs to do so. If she is adamant, then you will have to give up or tone down your fetish. She must be worried what if the neighbours, friends and family come to know about this.
You will have to be patient.
Please briefly explain why you feel this answer should be reported.
You are physically man and mentally woman and it is common among men but your wife might not want to accept you as a mentally woman and physically man. It does not harm anyone if you wear it but here your wife is uncomfortable you wearing such clothes so you should not force her or try to convince her to allow you otherwise your relationship might get bitter.
Fulfill your fantasy when you are alone and make her believe that you no longer want to wear bra and panty for the sake of married life. One thing you need to understand that it is not common in India that women are ready to accept such thinking of men. Compromise with your fantasy as you have no right to compel her to allow you otherwise slowly she will start holding resentment towards you and that would be very destructive on long run for your marriage life.