Hi there! I’m new but I need some advice… I’ve tried to find a similar problem posted by smb else but didn’t manage to find anything that would discribe a similar situation…
I know that a lot of people have much more serious problems but unfortunatley it doesn’t make me feel easier right now. The thing is that my husband doesn’t watch normal porn but only girls kissing and touching each other. I would have felt much better if that was usual porn… because like this it makes me think that he probably wants 2 girls in bed at the same time and I would never agree to that. He watches it very rarely but nevertheless I understand that this is something he fantasizes about and it makes me feel so bad. We have been married for over a year and have been living together for 2,5 years. I know that he adores me and loves me to bits. He is a wonderful caring person and I always want to make him happy but at the same time I always want to be Enough for him. We sometimes have some sexual problems due to the reason that I need more of it than he does and that he also can’t hold it for long so quite often I’m left completely unsatisfied. I have never shouted at him or blamed him for this but always tried to comfort him and help to find a solution for our problem but he only blames himself, apologizes and says that he doesn’t deserve such a gorgeous girl etc etc… But they are just the same words all the time and never any effort to listen to my suggestions. Only promises to try and make it better. So obviously knowing that we have such problems and then finding out that he was watching porn (doubtly “innocently”) just drives me mad. I once tried to talk to him very calmly about those “girl videos” but he just became all defensive and insane so now I am scared to mention it again. We still make love 2 or 3 times a week which is quite often but always the same. I’ve tried to ask him what he would like to try but he says that our sex is always amazing and he never wants anything different. I am an attractive girl and not shy at all, I am opened to any suggestions but involving the 3d person. So it looks like he wants the only thing I can’t give him!!
My post might seem pretty bad but in fact our marriage is really great apart from this. I understand I am exaggerating and most probably there isn’t much to worry about… But I am a stupid perfectionist and want to have a “dream marriage” in which there are as little misunderstandings as possible.
I would appreciate any comments and thoughts on this greatly. Thanks a lot!