My boyfriend has incest fantasizes and has been posting my pictures online.
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My boyfriend of 1 year has had a past form his teenage years where he writes and fantasizes on online portals, about sex with his mom. I was never aware of this and have recently came across this profile of his. He has used her real name there and I even suspect that its his mom in one of the photos.
As I dug deeper, I found that in his chats for the past 6 months, he has been using my name in chats, showing pictures of “his gf” and asking them to “talk dirty” about her (me). He has used my real name there. When I confronted him, he says he is now getting over it. He says it was a dark past and using my name was just to make himself guilty into coming over sex talking like that. He also says he has used my photo to show it to a random chat once.
Presently, I am very scared. I have deleted all my photos in his system. He is urging me to reconsider him, pleading that he is a changed person. But I am bewildered. I have loved him like crazy and saw a very bright future with him. But this incident has shaken me. I feel this person is different from the one I know. He has done this sex chatting using my name even when we were happily committed.
What does it mean? What should I do now? Please help.
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You have every reason to be scared due to this. He has tendency of fantasizing his close female relatives in sexual act with other/s! He derives pleasure from it .
May be he could be a cuckold in closet . If you would be in long term relationship with him it would not be wonder if one day he would propose you to have sex with someone else while he would love to watch ! He has voyeuristic streak inside him. By telling you this i am not at all scaring you off or suggesting that you should abandon him .
No . This is the time when he needs you most. You should stand with him and fight this stupid obsession that he is suffering from. Talk to him. If possible seek an expert help by getting in touch with the psychiatrist . Hope he will overcome this silly obsession at earliest . Best of luck!
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You do have a serious problem on your hands. On the one hand you are deeply in love and on the other the person you love has betrayed your trust. It must be very disturbing for you to see your photo, published online.
Make no mistake, this is a criminal offence as it compromises your personal space. You need to take immediate action. Are you willing to live with a person who has no morality? Human nature is such, that you would like to forgive, but can you forget what you are going through. It is never possible to reform in such instances and the incest leanings of your boyfriend are an indication to the level that he will stoop to.
You only talk of a photo. I would be surprised if he has not already got you to pose nude or in various stages of undress, so that he can post these pictures online. There are couples, where the lady enjoys the comments from strangers, but rarely is the face shown and definitely the names are faked.
What has been done, is done, but here are some guidelines for those reading this Answer.
Never take pictures (or videos) of yourself in any compromising position especially in various stages of undress. Once a picture is digital and on the internet EVERYONE can see your picture or video. When a picture or video of you is being taken, always try to imagine your loved ones, employers or respected elders viewing this image or video. Stop and think – Is this something you would be ok with them seeing?
If you do take pictures (or videos) of yourself in the nude (or in various stages of undress) do NOT send them to anyone, even if you completely trust the person.
If someone takes an intimate, private, personal picture (or video) of you ask them to delete it. Make sure you see that it has been deleted. Let your boyfriend know that you are serious about your privacy and security. Do not be intimidated. Get help if you need it, from parents, elders in the family, police or anyone with authority.
Friendships and intimate relationships are not always forever. Disgruntled friends, ex-boyfriends etc. are often the top offenders in posting undesirable images or videos. Even if you completely trust the individual you are sending the images to what would happen if their phone, tablet, laptop or pc were stolen? What if their email account was hacked? Your images could end up in the wrong hands very quickly.
Insist that your boyfriend remove all traces of what has been posted (he will quickly understand how difficult this is). Threaten him, that you will go to the police. Be confident.