My life is a mess. Please help
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Hello Anjali aunty and everyone here,
I am Raj, 23 years old, male and single. I am a new User of this forum. I like all the Answers. Now I am in trouble. Please help me aunty and my dear friends.
When I was 12, I became addicted to blue films, but it did not effect my studies. At 17, U fell in love in college. We loved each other very much. We had sex many times. 2 years have passed. Unfortunately, we brole up because she wanted me to do work and marry her, but i want to do my graduation.
I took admission in Engineering, made new friends there, but cant forget her. I tried everything to get her back but she refuses, by saying her parents are looking for a groom for her. i am hurt from inside and cant concentrate on studies. I feel guilty of loosing her for my career. I made many new friends to get rid of this but I feared to make any relationship.
I started watching porn and did it for 4 years. It felt good but it cant help, instead I have become addicted to my old childhood habit..Now, I cant live without watching porn daily and masturbate. I don’t want to marry now as I am not settled well in my career.
Help me aunty and my friends. I want to stop all this as it is affecting my real life. I am helpless..
Answers ( 2 )
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Let me give you a bit of reassurance here, there’s nothing harmful about masturbating daily, and you were right to focus on your career before considering marriage. You are on the verge of a good future. The future lifestyle you will have is determined by the effort you put in over the next several years. Once you have a B Eng, it will unlock doors for you, but then the real learning will begin!!! So, continue to focus on your goals so that you are making the best effort to succeed.
Having said that, all work and no play, makes Jack a dull boy, as the saying goes. So don’t neglect your friends, and take time to enjoy your freedom while it lasts. Once you have a well paid job, a home, a car, a bank loan,a wife, kids…… and all the other stuff that we accumulate, the opportunities for fun are strictly rationed, so, balance work and study time with play time, and you’ll do just fine.
Oh, and by the way, enjoying pornographyi s not a crime (as far as I’m aware anyway), nor is it likely hat you are addicted in the real sense of the word; you’re just a young horny guy who isn’t getting any real sex. Spending more time with friends in college will inevitably include meeting girls in a social setting. You are bound to meet a number of girls that are attractive, and if the feelings work out right, your porno watching hours will drop off tremendously. Remember one thing, DON’T BE ONE OF THE SELFISH PEOPLE THAT REFUSE TO WEAR A CONDOM. The I-pill is a contraceptive with nasty side effects, and really is only for emergencies. Only a condom protects you from STIs.
Good luck
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I can understand your situation because most guys go through something similar. May not be exactly same but never the less… heartbreak is a bitch that changes you but it is entirely up to you tondecide whether you want to be controlled by that sad fact. You need to move on in yiur life. You did the smart thing by choosing career. In this economy., you will need better education to get the best job. Dont fret over the girl who did not understand that.
Moving on, porn is not a bad thing. We all grew up watching it and I still do. We need some kind of distraction and porn is one of the ways to get it. You don’t have to stop watching it but I think you need to understand your priorities. Once you tell yourself that your education will help you in getting a good job… you will slowly rescue the time spent on porn. Ita the thing with masturbation. I used to masturbate almost daily when I was in medical college because of the stress. Do whatever helps you to reduce stress as long as it does not affect your regular life.
Dont be shy to get into a relationship. There are many girls out there who are independent and understand the value of a good partner. You need to move on buddy.. you need to trust others..