So I (26f) am planning to propose to my boyfriend(27m) . We’ve been dating for 4 years now and he’s the most important person in my life. We’ve discussed marriage, he was very eager to propose and has been saving money for some time I think. He’s an artist and doesn’t make quite as much but he’s way too proud to let me pitch in.

Well around last month , his mom had a surgery. I won’t go into details but it costed his parents quite a lot (she doesn’t have insurance idk why).He transferred them money from his own savings as well but didn’t tell me that (I even offered to help) That day I found him crying in our room. He told me all this and kept on apologising that the money he was saving for the ring had to go into helping his mom and now he can’t propose on our anniversary as he was planning to. It was so heartbreaking for me to see him like this tbh. I don’t give a damn about that ring?!? I want to marry this guy and I’d have done that in a courthouse if he’d agree. I told him all of that. But for him things like these are important. I actually kind of yelled at him as well for worrying about the wrong reason lol.

He told me to give him some time as he wants to get me the best he can. Well I’ve decided to propose on our anniversary. I’m doing it on a beach we used to visit a lot as kids, back in our hometown. I’m picking up the ring next week. Here comes my sister (28f). She’s had multiple failed relationships and still lives with our parents. She saw me looking at a ring photo when she was visiting me this Christmas so I told her I was planning to propose at the beach. She went silent for a minute and asked me if i was kidding her.

Apparently she caught her boyfriend of two years with someone else on that same beach and hates that place now. I wasn’t aware of this. This breakup was in September and back then she told me he was cheating and left her. She now wants me to cancel this whole thing and do it somewhere else. I admit, when her relationship ended, she took it pretty hardly. We all liked him and my sister was convinced he was the one so the breakup was really bad for her.

Yes it sucks what happened to her but I don’t know why should that affect my plans? Me and my bf visit that place everytime we’re there and it holds some importance to both of us. She’s now calling me selfish and how I only want to hurt her by reminding her of that trauma. She then proceeds to talk about my boyfriend and how he can’t propose and should be ashamed. I shut that down quickly and told her to drop that topic. The rest of the day she was moody and when she left, she was crying and called me heartless. She’s now texting me and saying me getting engaged isn’t important enough and I need to change the destination.

I need advice on how to deal with her? Am I really in the wrong here? All I know is I’m not changing the location whether I’m wrong or not. I’m kind of guilty but that’s just because we’ve been close since we were kids and I don’t really want to hurt her. Should I comfort her or something or is she being unreasonable? Also she lives with our parents and we’re close too so cutting her off isn’t an option.

Tldr; my sister caught her boyfriend cheating on a beach and now doesn’t want me to propose as I’m doing it on that beach as well.

Edit: As some have mentioned in the comments that this proposal might be ’emasculating’ to my boyfriend, I know him, and if it was actually something I’d be ‘taking away’ from him, I’d obviously never do it. We wanted to be engaged on our 5 year anniversary and I think that’s what he was guilty about plus some stress about his mom’s health. Thanks for the concern but I know he’ll love it.

Edit 2: Thank you for the response but I’ve seen some comments accusing my boyfriend and his parents of being immature and selfish. This is completely false. Be kind here please. His parents are lovely people. Yes, they’re financially struggling and my boyfriend decided to help his parents. I’d have been mad if my boyfriend decided to spend his money on a ring instead of helping his MOM. About the insurance thing, I only know half of the story yet and it’s not because his parents are immature. I’ll be talking to him about this later on. And he didn’t spend all his savings. His actual savings are separate from the money he was saving for the ring.