Sorry for the length in advance. In the two years before my wife and I got married, we regularly had sex where both of us initiated. Fast forward two years and a 1.5 year old baby later, my wife is only interested in sexual activity if she gets a massage before or after it.
Some context, I work from home and she is a stay at home mom. I am lucky enough to have the flexibility from my job to be able to watch the baby every other morning so she can sleep in until roughly 9:00. I make sure she has time to go to gym/rest etc. I do plenty around the house and she has no complaints there. My wife is pregnant again so I understand her hormones are going through it.
I regularly let her know I am attracted to her and she will jokingly laugh it off like I am being too much. These days, I always have to initiate and she always seems to begrudgingly do it as fast as possible. Her always wanting a back massage makes it feel like she is not attracted to me and is simply doing a trade to get something instead of having sex because she is also attracted to me.
I am at my wits end. I don’t know if there is anything else I can do to make sure she is more rested and not feeling trapped in our house. She knows this bothers me and says sex less than once a week is normal and that she is still attracted to me but I just don’t see it. Is there any hope this gets better as our children get older?