How do I put an end to my boring emotional life?
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My name is Yubi, I am from Africa, I came to kerala for an internship program in the month August, 2024 which of course is going on fine besides the fact that my emotional life has been totally non existent.
I have tried all I could to actually try and start a genuine relationship here in India, since the company I work with has decided to extend my stay by 2 years (which I have not accepted anyway). Believe me, I love the quite safe life here in Kerala, but because of the numerous laws that protect women from approaching them (even though it’s just for seeking the girl on a date) I tend to obey rules to the latter and hence am unable to approach a lady, not even in my place of work.
I have tried the online dating sites too but most ladies on the sites are keen to marry and not date per say before marrying and others are not even keen to imagine dating an African leave alone marriage because they can easily marry an Indian guy.
So people and Anjali, I really want to know if there are other options out there for me aside the obvious one of packing my belongings and saying Good bye to India?
Answers ( 3 )
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You seem to be like desperate for woman or for short time kind of relation, which is somehow not possible in India. You need to accept this fact and try to adjust in this condition as soon as possible. Keep on trying to get your transfer in Africa. You are right that Indian women are keen for marriage as this is Indian culture as being outsider you would find it weird but it is very common here. Remember patience is the key.
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India, traditionally, does not support a ‘dating’ culture. It is even worse in conservative places like kerala, and you , being a foreigner, makes it even worse. On top it, there is a community based system , wherein relationships are preferred only between people of the same community .
The only option for you would be to see if you can hook up with some foreigners. However, you can do a few things which might give you a better experience.
– You really need to befriend the locals. Not just at the place of work, but those near your house.. Like the auto drivers, the shopkeepers etc. If you get the knack of dealing with the locals, it is a different world for you
– If you have a fair bit of money to spend, you should be able to have some interesting times in foreigner-heavy places like kovalam.
– Try to adopt some of the local customs. Avoid flashy clothes and kiddish wear like bermudas etc. The more you stand out from the crowd, in terms of dress / behavior, the more difficult it is to get people to be comfortable with you
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I don’t agree with you.
Surely, Indian laws are strict than Africa, but that does not mean you can’t be friend of women in India. In office, it might be difficult, if you are trying to date your junior, but if you try with your colleague or boss, then shall not be a big problem.
Perhaps, here in India, your tactics of impressing a girl might not be working well. You cannot date a girl, fuck her all night then then next morning decide, whether to go ahead or not.
Here, you need to make friends first. You have to be center of attraction. Along with your routine work, you need to participate all the activities your company may offer during annual day. You have to be famous, then girls will start coming closer to you.
Everyone at work knows, you are here for internship. So why would they think of a person like you for short term relationship. You did not mention any special qualities of you. So what makes you special? Think over it and act accordingly.
I am from Mumbai, but as far as I know, Kerala state has most liberal law for women. They are free to do what ever they want.
It you want to date first, then fuck and then to fall in relationship, then you are in wrong city. Come to Mumbai, here you may find at least a escort of your type.