What is my way out from my wife’s domination?
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Dear anjali madam,
I married a rich and very beautiful lady last year in a love marriage.after 5 months her attitude changed suddenly. She forced me to quit my job in a reputed company and made me to stay home and do all the household chores. She made me her slave and do whatever she orders me like massaging her legs and hands when she returns from office and have sex during odd times when she feels like.
She gives me good food, branded clothes and even take me out to dining,movies and cricket matches often but never allows me to go out of the house alone or meet my friends. She always accompanies me even when i go to my parents’ house. She told me that if i break her rules or try to hire a lawyer to file divorce she wud lodge section 498 and put my entire family in jail. My parents wil not belive me as she projected a very good image of her in front of them.
What should I do?
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Feeling sad about your state, I was going through an article recently, that said more husbands are being tortured in India than wives. Still there is no legal support for husbands, thats why the cases are not registered. However some NGO has started operating these days who are being emotionally tortured.
For you, I felt bad and somehow good too. Wish could have a life like yours, that no job nothing, only sleep, eat and fuck. Thats not good for long run, still a heaven in this world.
Someone told me a funny statement, we are hyposrits with double standard, if husband dominates, he is abusive, if wife dominates, thats woman empowerment. That is true for your case too. People only in your shoe will know the pain of being a slave at own home.
She is pretty clever to keep an image as well as threatening you with 498A. In fact some study showed section 498A saves less women, rather let the women to abuse that more. You are living separate, you dont have an income now, for her to prove you are pressing her for money is easy case for her. You can talk to a lawyer, still 498A is such a rude act, you cant get away easily unless you act smart. First thing you have to do is make sure their is no child on the way coming and second step is consult a good lawyer. The rule has a loop hole, if within one year there is no complain, you cant get away. As its less than a year, you can file for a divorce saying there is no psychological adjustment happening. Try to do something stupid and get beaten, keep that as evidence in hospital and police station.
If you cant run now, after the year goes by, you wont be. And if there is any child, it would be too messy. I dont think she is so powerful in everyway possible, at the same time you are not so weak, unless you really are. There always are ways, you have to act the right way within legal grounds.
As you are out of job for some months, you will have tough time justify later about this, so run away as fast as you can. Thats the only solution. Rather than being a show piece on a great gold cage, its better to have your freedom and ego. sleeping on a railway station.
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You are trapped badly and she is being a rich woman takes you as her property and behave with you as if you are an object (using you for her intentions and left you). You have two options either you should oppose her wrongdoing despite of her threats or accept her as what she is and cooperate her. You should only here to play the key role to come out of this critical situation so first decide are you able to fight against her still to end as she is rich so definitely she has an influence of anyone. If you are, firm on your decision and want to come out of this mess up than you may because you are true at your stage and you are under emotional violence.
Talk to her about your decision and ask her to stop all her misbehaving with you. In the initial point she may react violently but if you are firm than she should accept your demand. You have enough evidence against her that she is treating you like servant (She forced you to leave your job which is biggest evidence) you may discuss with your parents about her behavior and I am sure they will understand you as you are their son. Do not give up with her threats as for her that is not an easy to prove you wrong or do not succumb to her emotional blackmailing as this your right to live with dignity.
I do not know whether you have explained your position to her parents or not if not than you should inform them right away. If you think then you may take the help of her friends who has a good influence on her and respect. In the last, you may go for divorce as last options, you are afraid of her threats that she will put your family behind the bar is not necessary. Look out for the solutions and you may find definitely.
Best of luck
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what kinds of household chores are you talking about?
if really sweeping or mopping floors or washing utensils, then dude, yours is not a story to be believed right away. as you said she is rich then she must be having enough wealth to afford a servant or two to do all those things.
is it some kind of a filmy story that a wife has changed her attitude suddenly to avenge something? like you have been massaging her feet and all, and all she cares to do to you is to treat like dogs? not to forget the sex urges at odd hours. uff! give it a break. i don’t really believe this.
you didn’t mention kids so it’s presumed you don’t have any. so what makes you accept her proposal to stay at home? and afterall on what grounds do you still face your parents that their daughter-in-law is working and the son is doing nothing, leading a life with no creativity at all?
still you’ve got no self prestige to stand up for yourself and are taking her favors by wearing those branded clothes or going to fancy dining or even cricket. do you have a spine or not?
why not we brand you with a lazy fool who has been trying to earn a lot of extra points on this website? you married her was your mistake on the first part. what kind of a person does love marriage and then gets treated like that? it makes evident that you had not thought over on this part and now you are being forced to live like that (provided your story here is true).
get your head out of your ass and see a lawyer. ohh! but i forgot, you don’t have any money of your own because you are a selfless slave to a woman (or a highly imaginative stupid in my view).
if your story is even a little bit of truth about how your wife treats you, then you really deserve this punishment because people like you who wish to live on other’s wealth should be treated the same way. No Fun Comes for Free mate.
enjoy the same slave’s life or quit like a real man and make things work your way. your choice.